Saturday 1 February 2014

Little things that matter ...


           The base for any relationship whether it’s with your parents, siblings, friends or that special someone is trust, love and care. It need not be expressed each and every time you meet or you are together, but it’s those little things, unspoken words, silent gestures, or just a simple hug that matters the most. Even if you don’t talk to each other for a long time its normal, when you meet everything is just the same. It’s not the expensive gifts, precious pearls or grandiloquent stuff that matter. It is that one sweet text or call telling you that “you are being missed!” or maybe “Hey I just thought of you!” will be enough to make someone’s day. At the same time, completely ignoring that person in your life, may not only create a vacuum in your own life, but also leave that person feeling lost and alone, as if suddenly someone had removed them from the life supporting system.

          If you care for someone, show it! Don’t think about the consequences because all that matters is you and that one person whom you care for. If your bond is really strong and deep-rooted, it will stand the test of time. But if it is just up on the exterior and is weak, if it hasn't been nurtured the right way with enough care and love, it will definitely fall apart, taking you along, leaving either or both of you shattered.

          There’s no course that any institution offers in learning how to maintain relations with those around us. Neither are there any rules that are a sure-shot guarantee to a harmonious life and a peaceful atmosphere around you. People say that do this, do that, don’t behave like this, etc etc. But trust me, all of this is just personal experience, it may or may not be true. None of this is rocket science; all you need is a positive perception to everything. The deepest and the strongest bonds have to go through the test of time, if it stands, then well that’s the way it’s supposed to be; but if it doesn't, find the faults and make amends. If you've been through thick and thin together, that relationship defies every theory and set of rules on this earth.

          It is not about give and take, it’s about giving without expecting anything in return. I know, all of this is easier said than done. We expect from those whom we are super close to. Most of the times, they meet your expectations, but there are times when they fail to do so. It’s about how you react to the uncertainty, the unfulfilled expectations and promises. Of course you will feel terrible; you’ll feel let-down, ditched or back-stabbed (whatever suits the situation). Just ask one thing to your friend, “Is this why we shared so much, created so many memories, gone through everything together, was all of this – momentary? “ and I’m sure if that person is true to you, the answer will be a no and you can work things out. Also, don’t forget to ask yourself a few things, "Does this one thing change everything between the two of you? Does this define your relation? Is this how you planned your fairy-tale?.”  If it’s genuine, your mind and heart will be in unison and will help you find a solution to the chaos playing in your head.
         
          Either of you will have to put aside that little devil named ‘ego’ and just forget every wrong thing that happened for every right thing that has happened and is going to happen. If this devil succeeds to seep into your heart and mind, it will kill every feeling, make you feel worse and will leave you confused. Often people say if something was not meant to happen, it won’t. Agreed that destiny plays a major role, so does your own genuine efforts. Then you have people who keep saying that if somebody leaves you, it’s not the end of the world, move on. I agree that it is not the end of the world, these are personal choices that people make for themselves and you don’t have any say in it. It’s just that few of your dreams come crashing down from cloud nine to ground zero and it hurts to the power of infinity.

           It is said that the “greatest gift that you can give anyone is your time, your attention and your love.” It’s an advice to all those who want to keep their bonds with those around them strong forever, try this. It costs nothing at all except a few bundles of smiles, a few kilos of care and your precious time. It’s the cheapest gift you could give to anyone in this world and it’s a sure-shot guarantee that it will bring a smile on the face of your loved one. It takes few seconds to break ties with someone, but sometimes it could take more than your entire life to regain the trust, love and care someone ever had for you.

P.s: This is my article which featured in my college magazine- H L Times! ;)
Feedback/criticism welcome! :)