Now - the new forever

      It’s funny how things change. It is said that change is an inevitable part of life. Totally agree. These changes aren’t so obvious and evident instantly. It may all look the same but when you ponder and look back you realize how far you’ve come.For example, two people start at point ‘A’ and as time passes by they reach point ‘E’ in their journey together. When they look back at the steps taken together and the years that have passed by, they notice the changes. It’s not only about the change in environment and external surroundings. But change in their equations, Change in their way of interacting with each other. Or maybe a change in the way they feel about each other. You can change in a million ways and still feel the same.

     Of course change is important and inevitable at the same time. We all know this. But I fail to realize the rationale behind change in feelings for people around you. Especially the ones you called ‘special’.  And the logic behind losing someone’s company – a friend, best friend or special someone- doesn’t make sense. It’s like trying to convince yourself to forget someone you loved and whose presence you cherished. Of course you’ll be devastated. But at the same time it’s true that you’ll get over it. Because Hey! everyone has the right to decide who stays and who doesn’t. So probably the best way out of this mess is to wrap up the bundle of memories, lock it inside your heart, wish the best for them and walk away. Remember that it’s best for you and them too. It is a universal fact that if something belongs to you and if it is meant for you, it will find its way back no matter what happens.

     In the past couple of months, staying away from home, interacting with new and different people, I’ve learned a lot of things. Lessons that I wouldn’t have understood if I were at home being pampered with love, warmth and care. Firstly, don’t take people around you for granted. They’re there because they love you. Secondly, keep reminding them now and then that you love them and that you appreciate their presence in your life. If something random happens and you’re reminded of them, call them or maybe send a text, it will bring a smile on their face and make their day. Thirdly, not everyone loves in the same way as you do. Every person is different and so is their way of expressing! Some might be able to say it, while others won’t. But they’ll express through their little gestures that would scream out loud that they love you. Don’t be too stupid to not notice!

    And don’t expect everything to last forever. As bad as it might sound but ‘forever’ is a myth created by people like you and me to make our hearts feel secure. So instead of wishing for forever, let’s wish for ‘NOW’. Live in the present, Love people now, care for them now, be there for them now. And forever won’t be too far. Keep smiling Stay happy. 

A New Beginning!

I've often seen people protect their hearts fiercely. Even if that means that they get labelled as heartless, stone hearted and cold. Probably because they've been hurt badly or maybe they've seen someone close go through hell. And more often than not, people get scared more because they've seen someone go through hell and suffer the pain. And maybe that is why we shield our hearts and wrap it with a 'Handle With Care'  tag.

When we suffer a heartbreak, it could be anything from someone breaking our trust,  leaving us in the middle of nowhere, or maybe just walking out for no reason. I've realized that it is not the heartbreak that causes the pain. It is the feeling of change and the fear of it that hurts and makes a person sad. It isn't the agony caused by a fight that haunts us, it is the darkness that the memories of the past brings into our present.

Most of us, see people go through hell, suffer silently and accept the pain. And this is the reason why most of us just generalize and jump to conclusions. We think that we're better off alone. We believe that building a wall around our heart will save us the trouble.We choose to not get close to anyone, often questioning the most genuine souls too. Because maybe somewhere deep down in our heart we believe that we might just fall for the wrong person.

We are tuned in such a way that we give way more than we receive. And most of the time, I've seen that people shower the wrong people with care, love, attention and time. And mind you, if someone gives you their attention, cares for you, loves you and gives you their time, it isn't because they have nothing else to do, it is because they have thousand other things to look after but still chooses you. But after a point, we just tend to give up. We give up on people, give up our hopes and mostly give up on life.

We live in our own world, where we choose to not understand things around us, living through the confusion, not believing that anything can happen if you give life another chance. And time and again, people move on and give life a second chance. A second chance to start afresh, to believe in magic and dream of dreams that could be true. And as they say ' Dil toh bacha hai ji!' Have faith and believe in the start of something new.

No Strings Attached!

We humans are tuned in such a way that we love and care for those who are close to us. We do everything possible in our capacity to keep them happy. We seldom think twice before putting their wish and happiness before ours. Somewhere in our hearts we seek happiness in their joy. And in these times, we are the most ‘selfless’ individuals. We give way more than we have, We do things beyond our capacity. We are ready to cross oceans and move mountains for them. And we expect the same love and care in return.

The problem starts when we expect the same things in return. We expect the opposite person to be like us and do things that we would whole heartedly do for them. And when they do not meet our set standards or expectations, we get hurt. We start to wonder about our importance in their life. We wonder if even they would be willing to cross oceans for us. We wonder if we ever meant anything to them. So to say the least, our ‘love’ comes with  ‘*’ – a terms and conditions apply tag. We often forget that every individual is different. And that is why we try to judge them with parameters that we’ve set for ourselves.

As kids, we were often taught in our ‘moral science class’ that every individual is unique. Obviously, you wouldn’t be happy if someone is your exact copy in any way. We all know this, but we kind of forgot it when we left school. Some of us can express ourselves easily. But some of us just can’t get ourselves to express or convey what we feel. Some of us are outgoing and friendly, but others may take time to be able to express happiness or hurt. So maybe one person may regard something as good, but at the same time someone else might not find it conducive.  But this doesn’t mean that those who can’t get themselves to express their love and care easily don’t feel anything. Of course they do, but they choose not to be so open about their feelings and choices.

We don’t open up to anybody and everybody. Probably we’re scared of being misunderstood, scared of being hurt and alone or maybe just scared of being rejected. Somewhere our own insecurities and doubts hold us back. Maybe we’re too scared of being attached. Someone once told me: “never get attached to anyone or anything, learn to let go”. But my only argument was how do you not get attach to someone or something? Should you like stop and become anti-social? Because maybe if you do nothing you might not end up getting attached to anything or anyone.  (And I know that’s not possible right) Then how do you do it? It is like doing something that has the power to hurt you, but not actually giving it the power to do so. A Metaphor.

There is this universal rule: Everything that comes together falls apart. And we need to understand this. If we deserve something, it will come to you. But of course you need to make efforts to achieve it. And after a point, you need to let things unfold on its own. Ever heard of karma? She has a strange way of coming back and give you what you deserve. So keep sending out love and happiness in the universe, and see how this comes back to you in abundance. Always believe that if its meant for you, it will come back to you sooner or later. So Keep smiling through the confusion and live life by one rule: No strings attached! Stay happy !