Message in a Bottle

       I was reading this book "Message in a bottle" by Nicholas Sparks. And most of you will agree to have fallen in love with almost all of his books, especially "A Walk to remember"! It is the epitome of love, it teaches you how to love, and what exactly it feels to have loved deeply and lost! It is about the crazy love, more about love-at-first-sight and things that make your heartbeats race and makes you go 'awww', while managing to make you cry, you feel the pain and hurt of those fictional characters as if it were happening to someone you knew or worst case scenario, it was happening to you itself ( god forbid )

       The story is all lovey-dovey and heart warming throughout, up until the climax. It made me realize what a great role 'Destiny' plays, how amazingly talented it is in its work! Two people, complete strangers, who are totally oblivious to each others existence, their lives get entwined in a fairy-tale way. They both have loved someone deeply in the past, losing their partners to fate. But destiny brings them together and how! And making everything perfect, the same destiny that brought them together, separates them! But before that happens, it gives them a reason to fall in love all over again, to fall in love with someone, to fall in love with life, in general. It helps them create memories together, that would be etched in their memories forever. Their world changes overnight, the gloomy, mundane days are now filled with love and warmth, hope and re-affirmed willingness to fall in love. Take a bow Mr. Destiny! First, bring two people together, make them fall in love with each other, more importantly they fall in love with 'love' itself. And then Mr. Destiny shakes it up a little, turning everything upside down. The wise men said, "If it was meant to be, it will always be". All of this, just re-affirms our faith in love, making it deeper and stronger.

       I don't know what is to have loved and lost and i really don't know what it is to fall in love either. but by what I've seen, heard and read about love, it's a beautiful feeling. But i know that most of us claim to be in love, but that makes me wonder. Can you really love someone selflessly, without any expectations in return? I guess all of us are in love with the idea of being in love. And there's where we lose the real essence of it! The book made me sit and wonder about many things of life, in general. One things for sure, in this game of life, Mr. Destiny is one big game changer and a very powerful and experienced one at that, too.

       When you are in love with someone and you know its for real, but then destiny separates you forever, where there's no hope or even the slightest chance of reunion with your loved one, there's no slight possibility of being with that person again, hugging them, telling them how much you love and care for them, why are they brought into your life in the first place? Ofcourse having them in your life, though for a brief moment is worth it but if death could separate you so soon and so easily, why would fate come up with a story like this for just anyone?

       One  question that the book answered, made me realize that that "happily ever after" can be for a short time, 'perfect' need not always be 'forever'. But then does forever end the day we die? or is it then the beginning?
Still a mystery ...! Stay happy... !  Keep Smiling ..!

P.s: This article is inspired by the same book, just random thoughts that lingered on my mind as an after-effect. ;)
P.p.s: To all those who haven't read it, do read it.
You surely don't want to miss out on something that takes your breath away! :D 

The Other Truth

     Someone tells you "you're my world" and you tend to believe it. Someone tells you "you're the most important person in my life" and you believe it yet again. Someone tells you "you're the top most priority of my life" and as usual you believe it once again.

     Humans are made in such a way that they tend to believe anything and everything that makes them feel loved, special and wanted. It's the way we are tuned to listen to our hearts more as compared to our mind. Although, we very well know that our heart might fall prey to false emotions shown by any random person but mind will always find the logical reasoning for each and everything that happens to us and those around us. Sometimes we know the truth, yet our heart compels us to believe 'the other truth' - the one that makes us happy.

     Sometimes we are busy finding answers to questions we already have answers for, but these answers aren't what makes us feel right. So, our dearest, Mr heart tempts us to build a world of our own, a world of 'make-believe'. We have our own customised versions of truth and everything happens as we would want it to, only in that small fantasy world of ours.

     For instance, we know that something we desperately want to happen, wont happen. But our heart forces us to find a ray of hope, perhaps a silver lining. I really don't know why we do it but maybe the truth might cause us a lot of pain all at once and that will leave us feeling terrible. While the heart will make you want to believe things that don't exist, stories that aren't real and feelings that aren't true. This exactly explains why we still believe in fairy tales, where a knight in shinning armour saves the damsel in distress, where love stories have a "happily-ever-after", where pooh has only one piglet and where Cinderella finally meets her prince charming !

     The heart consoles you for a while and lets the truth unfold before you in parts. Does it cause pain? Yes, it does, but in instalments. Maybe that is manageable for most of us. So rather than dealing with the pain all at once we choose to suffer little by little, piece-by-piece from time-to-time, as it allows us the liberty to gather the broken pieces one-by-one and get ready to face a little more pain.

     We wish for lives that don't exist, love stories that aren't real and believe that something like magic and luck exists. So yes lets face it, there's no magic and there's nothing like luck. But I have to say that if you work hard you might get lucky, but that's rare, because most of us don't believe in making the effort to get something or keep someone in our lives. All of this is just to fool ourselves and trick our mind and heart to believe something that doesn't exist and keep ourselves happy for a long time.

     All of these memories, songs, love stories, 'happily-ever-after' tales etc. are nothing but ways to keep us glued to our own make-believe world, our world of fantasy. All of this just to avoid bursting the bubble we live in. These things force us to not let go but to keep trying, work hard and fulfil our dreams. But the question remains, how much can you keep trying? and what will happen if one day suddenly we have to face the reality we were trying to avoid? These questions baffle me and I'm sure in some or the other phase of our lives, we all go through this pain and confusion. Whether to accept the TRUTH and move ahead or wait there and keep trying! Is the 'other truth' really worth it? Maybe, Maybe not. Go figure it out for yourselves!
 

Love. Smile. Believe.

       All along this journey called life, we meet many people, build many relationships, create memories - good as well as bad, we love a few, care for them, receive love and care from those around us, make people feel special and a few make you feel special too. Then there are few bitter moments, fights, hurting others- knowingly or unknowingly, lose someone you  love, have misunderstandings... these things tear you apart and make you feel worthless. All of this makes your story. We don't realize, but all of this - each and every thing - however small and irrelevant event in our life makes our journey worth the while. 

      After every happy moment there has to be something that tears you apart. Just like after every bright morning there comes a night so dark that it scares you, but after every such scary dark night, comes a bright new morning... This promise of a bright morning and the hope in our heart, makes us live each day of our life. Similarly after every failure, every heartbreak, every loss, there lies ahead of us success, love, care, happiness - in abundance! 

      "If you don't see a dream come true, maybe it's not "yet" time ..."  It is this "hope" that is instilled in our hearts that makes us pick ourselves up every-time we stumble and fall. We should take both the good and the bad things in our stride and move ahead. People come into your life for a purpose. Everything happens for a reason. We wont realize this right away, but one day it will all make sense. When happiness arrives, say, “Welcome, Make yourself comfortable." when she  leaves, ask her to leave the door open behind her. Similarly even when people leave you, let them leave, but do believe in the bond you shared, the memories you made, keep full faith and trust in your relations and they will find their way back to you! Have faith in god and his plans! 

                                                                                                               

      When you reach at the end of the rope, tie a knot and hold on! And remember, there is light at the end of every tunnel. The only difference is some tunnels are short while most of them are long, dark and scary. It's how you deal with these long, dark and scary nights that matter the most and this is what makes you strong. 

      In all this chaos and madness of life, remember to wear your best smile and be happy, feel happy and stay positive. All the ups and downs, every failure, every heartbreak and every other thing that puts you down is just making you strong, making you realize the worth of what you have, to treasure everything and everyone around you. 

Keep Smiling and Stay Happy! :D 

Little things that matter ...

           The base for any relationship whether it’s with your parents, siblings, friends or that special someone is trust, love and care. It need not be expressed each and every time you meet or you are together, but it’s those little things, unspoken words, silent gestures, or just a simple hug that matters the most. Even if you don’t talk to each other for a long time its normal, when you meet everything is just the same. It’s not the expensive gifts, precious pearls or grandiloquent stuff that matter. It is that one sweet text or call telling you that “you are being missed!” or maybe “Hey I just thought of you!” will be enough to make someone’s day. At the same time, completely ignoring that person in your life, may not only create a vacuum in your own life, but also leave that person feeling lost and alone, as if suddenly someone had removed them from the life supporting system.

          If you care for someone, show it! Don’t think about the consequences because all that matters is you and that one person whom you care for. If your bond is really strong and deep-rooted, it will stand the test of time. But if it is just up on the exterior and is weak, if it hasn't been nurtured the right way with enough care and love, it will definitely fall apart, taking you along, leaving either or both of you shattered.

          There’s no course that any institution offers in learning how to maintain relations with those around us. Neither are there any rules that are a sure-shot guarantee to a harmonious life and a peaceful atmosphere around you. People say that do this, do that, don’t behave like this, etc etc. But trust me, all of this is just personal experience, it may or may not be true. None of this is rocket science; all you need is a positive perception to everything. The deepest and the strongest bonds have to go through the test of time, if it stands, then well that’s the way it’s supposed to be; but if it doesn't, find the faults and make amends. If you've been through thick and thin together, that relationship defies every theory and set of rules on this earth.

          It is not about give and take, it’s about giving without expecting anything in return. I know, all of this is easier said than done. We expect from those whom we are super close to. Most of the times, they meet your expectations, but there are times when they fail to do so. It’s about how you react to the uncertainty, the unfulfilled expectations and promises. Of course you will feel terrible; you’ll feel let-down, ditched or back-stabbed (whatever suits the situation). Just ask one thing to your friend, “Is this why we shared so much, created so many memories, gone through everything together, was all of this – momentary? “ and I’m sure if that person is true to you, the answer will be a no and you can work things out. Also, don’t forget to ask yourself a few things, "Does this one thing change everything between the two of you? Does this define your relation? Is this how you planned your fairy-tale?.”  If it’s genuine, your mind and heart will be in unison and will help you find a solution to the chaos playing in your head.

         

          Either of you will have to put aside that little devil named ‘ego’ and just forget every wrong thing that happened for every right thing that has happened and is going to happen. If this devil succeeds to seep into your heart and mind, it will kill every feeling, make you feel worse and will leave you confused. Often people say if something was not meant to happen, it won’t. Agreed that destiny plays a major role, so does your own genuine efforts. Then you have people who keep saying that if somebody leaves you, it’s not the end of the world, move on. I agree that it is not the end of the world, these are personal choices that people make for themselves and you don’t have any say in it. It’s just that few of your dreams come crashing down from cloud nine to ground zero and it hurts to the power of infinity.

           It is said that the “greatest gift that you can give anyone is your time, your attention and your love.” It’s an advice to all those who want to keep their bonds with those around them strong forever, try this. It costs nothing at all except a few bundles of smiles, a few kilos of care and your precious time. It’s the cheapest gift you could give to anyone in this world and it’s a sure-shot guarantee that it will bring a smile on the face of your loved one. It takes few seconds to break ties with someone, but sometimes it could take more than your entire life to regain the trust, love and care someone ever had for you.

P.s: This is my article which featured in my college magazine- H L Times! ;)
Feedback/criticism welcome! :) 

Ignorance is bliss!

          It is funny how people play politics with their friends and dear ones, use them as guinea pigs to fulfill their own selfish motives, make use of cheap tricks and dirty politics to move ahead in their lives. All of this for two minutes of fame, name, wealth and momentary pleasures? Seriously? Aren't these relationships and these people who care for you, love you for what you are and trust you blindly, far more rewarding than fame and recognition?

          We often commit a mistake of taking people at face-value and lay our trust on them. We force ourselves to believe that no matter what, they'll stand by us in difficult times. And once you trust them, its hard to even think that they might have an ulterior motive. They make you believe that come what may they wont go against you. When people start being good to us, we automatically trust them with our secrets, our weaknesses and our strengths. It is not like the person who says "I'll-be-there-for-you!" will always stick around.

          It's just more than what meets the eye, but then we have always been taught that people are good to us if we're good to them, I mean that's the way it works. But sometimes there are a few exceptions around us. for example, you may be very nice to a certain someone around you and that person might pretend to be nice to you, too. But then c'mon they're just pretending to be nice. A few people are of the opinion that at times if you really don't want to be good to certain individuals, you have no other option but being civil to them and rather not being frank, that way you just avoid people talking bad about you behind your back. ( to a certain extent! )

          Then, there are a few individuals who feel they run the world (blah!), that the entire universe is made for them only (blah blah!), as if the entire universe revolves around them (blah blah blah!), basically, they're just pure attention seekers. These people rather don't believe in something like ethics and maintaining relations and friendship. Everything and everyone is just a joke for them, just an instrument to get ahead in their own selfish motives. The attention seekers wont seek attention anymore if we stop paying attention to their whimsical ways. We should keep such people at a distance and not let them affect our lives in any possible manner.

         The best way to avoid such people and problems affecting your life in any possible manner is to ignore them. Some people might wreak havoc in your life and they definitely want you to get upset, angry, irritated, frustrated and much more. Here, we might want to make an exception to one of newton's laws "For every action there's an equal and opposite reaction". if we just ignore what such people do and just don't react they'll eventually get tired of it and it'll make them wonder why you aren't reacting. As they say, "Ignorance is bliss..." :)

        A lot of problems will be solved, if we talk to each other rather talking about each other. Also, we should learn that instead of bad-mouthing people and wasting your energy to devise plans to trouble others, why don't we just use that energy to make our lives better and earn a few brownie points by genuinely being good to people around us (heard of Karma, ever?). Life is really short to adopt a 'Tit for tat' policy and take revenge from others, instead, be good and nice and kind to those around you (in a genuine manner!). And if you can't do this, then atleast don't mess with someone's life! Keep smiling, be good, stay happy! :)

Reality Check!

          Often I see people around me who are 24*7 busy in chatting and text-ing and posting stuff about themselves on the net and elsewhere ...somewhere i feel they're basking in the glory of their self-made illusion of popularity...and are proud of the long list of friends... but the fact is that they are alone and these sites are just a way to escape the reality!

          Whatsapp, Facebook, Viber,Twitter, BBM, Hike, WeChat... etc, Its a never-ending list of Social networking sites and text messaging apps that have literally made the distance between people almost Invisible. We're all online and connected 24*7*365 days! The main purpose of these apps and sites was to bring people close, to keep them updated about things happening in the lives of their closed ones, it was meant to bridge the distance... No matter which part of the world you're in you can still be in-touch.

          But sometimes I wonder the need for these platforms and apps? Do we really 'connect' with people? Do we really 'like' the things happening in their lives or do it just for the sake of showing that you are 'socially active'? Have we really bridged the 'distance'?

          Having millions of friends or followers, or maybe a long list of contact, many groups that you're part of in one of those 'cool' text messaging apps ...really makes you happy? Many people do boast about the fact that they have 'so many' freinds on social networking sites and 'so many' followers and they think that their so popular! But one question has been in my head for a long time now!

          Do you really feel that all of these friends and followers wish the best for you? Do they really care? Are they really bothered about whats happening in your life ? do you really feel loved ? Are we really getting close to our near and dear ones? or is the distance just increasing day-by-day...?

          I don't think millions of friends and followers or a long list of contacts, however influential, may bring you the real happiness and joy to your heart. Even if you're among a group of people, you will still feel alone ...but sometimes, being with just one person or even talking to that person makes your day, makes you feel alive and instills in you the want of living for yet another day!

          Millions of likes on your posts or pictures, the never-ending compliments, etc can never match up to a kind word by someone who's very dear to you. Even if you receive thousands of compliments on your picture or status or any random post, at the end of the day, it is just that ONE person whose opinion matters the most... and you'll be waiting for that person to give his/her opinion about it. *Really*

          Sometimes it happens with most of us, that people who are on your 'friend' list are around you, but you hardly talk, we don't even bother to acknowledge their presence, we avoid each other, this all just seems weird and vague.


          These confession pages are a great way to tell things you don't have the guts to say up-front to someone, but in your life you'll always have someone who is your confession page, to whom you'll run up ASAP and tell every tiny bit of detail of everything that happened to you, every little secret, every story, the reason behind your mood-swings, the reason for feeling low, with whom you can talk anything and everything ....  

            We may feel alone in a crowd or feel lonely even with a single person, all that matters is that one person with whom you can be yourself, you can be YOU! Someone who accepts you as you are, doesn't put you down with their expectations,  just loves you and doesn't expect anything in return. Keep that person always with you and never let go off that person, Because they'll stand by you in good times and in bad times and will hold your hand through this journey called ...Life!

            Its high time we start 'connecting' with people around us first and then think of those who are far away! Keep smiling! Stay happy! 

P.s:- I am not saying these sites and apps are bad, but all that I am trying to say is we have changed its real meaning. Just to get close with people who are far away from us, we have distanced ourselves from those around us, those who are just a call away, few minutes away and just a 'HELLO' away from us! Think about it!

And yes! Feedback/criticism are always welcome. :)

One last try?

         So you start something very enthusiastically, with a dedication to never leave it halfway, to make that thing (or maybe a person!) your life, your everything! but all of a sudden, few distractions, maybe lack of interest, boredom or your own indecisiveness makes you give up all of it!

         The question being: Isn't that one thing or person worth a little patience from your side? Just one last try to make it happen? Are we willing to just give it all up for silly reasons? Why do we always give up when the going gets tough?

  

         Maybe we expect a lot from everything we try to do, from each and every person around us, and when our expectations and reality doesn't match, we feel its not meant for us. But to make something happen, a strong will, lots of efforts, hard-work and a sincere wish in our heart to make it happen is essential. 

         

         Its not like one day you get up and suddenly decide to do something and since you don't succeed, by the end of the day, you give it up! Its not easy to give up something that's close to your heart. And if you do give up on it, it never was close to your heart! You have to try every possible way, or in other words, every Jugaad to make it happen because even if its written in god's plans, you still have to work to achieve it. (Remember: God helps those who help themselves!)

         So don't just give up on it, you never know how close you are to your final reward! You cannot leave something that's become an indispensable part of your life, you cannot just walk away because things didn't go your way or the way you had expected things to be like, you can always try and make things work. Moreover, its hard to give up on something that's close to one's heart, right?

         And remember, When the going gets tough, the tough gets going! Stay Happy! :)